Candidates regularly tell me the samething: "I can't stand it anymore." The boss is difficult. The work is boring. The salary hasn't increased in two years.

I understand every one of those frustrations. But my honest response is often: "At least you have a job." Plenty of talented people would give a lot to be in that seat right now. That's not a reason to stay forever. It's a reason to step back and reframe.

Where the frustration really comes from

Most frustration comes from a gap betweenwhat you expected and what you're getting:

• ‍The manager: Micromanagement, poor communication, no recognition.
• ‍Boredom: The role that stretched you three years ago now runs on autopilot.
• ‍Salary: You rincome hasn't kept up with what you think the market pays.
• ‍Lack of control: Decisions taken above you, priorities that change weekly.
• ‍Comparison: A colleague's promotion makes your own job look smaller.

Reframing the situation

Reframing doesn't mean pretending that everything is fine. It means looking at the same facts from a different angle.

• ‍"My boss is awful" becomes "I'm learning to manage upwards", a skill everysenior leader needs.
• ‍"This job is so routine" becomes "This job is stable, and frees up headspace for a qualification or time to network."
• ‍"I'm underpaid" becomes "I'm being paid while I look for something better."

The psychology of acceptance

Acceptance is seeing your situation clearly so you can put your energy where it counts. Sort your frustrations into two lists:

• ‍What you can influence. Your skills, network, CV, how you handle your manager, when you start looking.
• ‍What you can't. Your boss's personality, the budget cycle, the market.

Resentment grows when we waste energy onthe second list.

It can take 6 to 12 months to find a senior role at the moment, and most candidates I meet don't realise that. So if you do start looking, expect it to take time.

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